The Crossover of Insanity
by Blac1990
Summary: The title explains a lot here. This is what happens when two extremely hyper anime fans are still awake at five in the morning. The animes involved are YuYu Hakusho and YuGiOh! for the most part. Teen Titans and Inuyasha are included as well.
1. Part 1, Chapter 1

Disclaimer

This story is a fan fiction. We own nothing (save part of the plot, which at this point we don't have; Mandy and Ash, who are real people even though the names aren't theirs; and the apartment Ash and Mandy are in is rented by Ash's parents) 'This is a fanfiction of the following animes/mangas: _Sailor Moon, Yu-Gi-Oh, YuYu Hakusho, Ranma 1/2, _and_ Teen Titans_. 'Tis also a fan fiction of two other fan fictions. They are "Lily of the Black Rose" by BlacVlvtn and the "Sailor Ranko" series. The "Sailor Ranko" series can be found at "burger bill. com" under the link entitled "Sailor Ranko Fanfiction" or something similar to that. From there, there are links to the different stories. "Lily of the Black Rose" is somewhere on this web site (under anime and _Yu-Gi-Oh!_ rated PG-13). I strongly encourage you to read the other fan fictions before you read this fan fiction.

Author's Note

We were _extremely_ hyper when we started writing this. "The ancient book of magic. com"is probably not a real website. If it is, please don't sue us. When "Sirius" appears we are talking about the star. Any time "Rei-Hiei" appears, we are talking about the Hiei that appears on the TV show. Any time Hiei appears, we are talking about a kid that was possessed when he was about three years old by Rei-Hiei, but you won't have to worry about that until the demon exorcising spell, AKU RYO TAI SAN, appears. The following list is of the characters we are using who transform into Sailor Senchi, the age we are using for them, their **Senchi form, power/element, and where their Senchi form came from.** Oh, and, in case you haven't read the "Sailor Ranko" series (which you should have by now, if not, find the website in the disclaimer and read the story) Female Ranma : Sailor Sun : Bunny/Serena/Usagi : Sailor Moon.Yugi : Tuxedo Mirage : Darien/Mamorou; Tuxedo Mask/Tuxedo Kaman

Ranma Saotome, 16, Sailor Sun, Fire, "Sailor Ranko" series

Akane Saotome (Akane has married Ranma), 16, Sailor Io, Lava, "Sailor Ranko" series

Mandy Good, 14, Sailor Sirius, Water, "The Crossover of Insanity"

Ash Cochran, 14, Sailor New Moon, Chaos/Shadows/Destruction, "The Crossover of Insanity"

Serenity Wheeler, 13, Sailor Serenity, Love, "The Crossover of Insanity"

Lily Kaiba, 15, Sailor Black Rose, Fire/Curses, "The Crossover of Insanity"

Téa Gardner, 15, Sailor Delta, Solar, "The Crossover of Insanity"

Yugi Mutou, 15, Tuxedo Mirage, "The Crossover of Insanity"

Raven Metrion, 16, Sailor Azarath, Darkness, "The Crossover of Insanity"

Misti Ryou, 16, Sailor Rhea, "The Crossover of Insanity"

Mai Valentine, 24, Sailor Harpy, Wind, "The Crossover of Insanity"

Ishizu Ishtar, 21, Sailor Alpha Star, Time, "The Crossover of Insanity"

**The Crossover of Insanity**

**Part I: The Start of an Odd Summer Break**

**Chapter 1: What Came Through the Ceiling**

**by AEC1990, BlacVlvtn, and Kage**

After being beaten up by demons, the Reikei Tantei (Yusuke's team) came crashing through the ceiling of a fan girl's friend's room in a three-story apartment building (the fan girl and her friend were on the first floor). Unfortunately for the Reikei Tantei, the fan girl was there and they had an unlimited supply of lead clothing and chains, duct tape, sledgehammers, and mallets. No one really knows why, but that's not important. The Reikei Tantei were worn out from the fight they lost. The fan girl and her friend were able to tie them from the ceiling. The fan girl and her friend went to "the ancient book of magic. com"and found the spell "How to Conjure Chibis" (technically, this spell isn't very ancient…):

Ingredients (measuring per person), Directions, and Chant

1 cup powderoodles

1 decagram chili powder

1 gram cinnamon sugar

1 pinch parsley flakes

1 gram garlic salt with parsley

1 gram oregano leaves

2 teaspoons basil leaves

½ teaspoon garlic powder

3 cut yams

1 box raspberry Jell-O

1 box lemon Jell-O

8 oz. tomato sauce

1 herring

2 teaspoons salt

1 cup vegetable oil

2 cups flour

Mix well in well-greased cauldron (sizes may vary). For one chibi, the cauldron should be about the size of a dishwasher. Recite spell:

Chibi, chibi, come alive!

Chibi, chibi, don't you die!

Chibi, chibi, we want you!

Chibi, chibi, you will be

In every way, exactly

Like the true you!

(In other words,

Like the person's chibi that you are)

After they followed the directions, the cauldron spewed red smoke.. From the smoke came the Chibi Reikei Tantei. Chibi Kuwabara said, "Where are we?" in his dumb voice.

Chibi Kurama (the smart one) said, "We have obviously been conjured from the world of the chibis," as Chibi Hiei hit Chibi Kuwabara on the head with one of the girls' mallets.

"Yeah, baka ningen," muttered Chibi Hiei

authors' note: before this time, all big characters had duct tape over their mouths.

Kurama asked, "Who are you?"

"Shut up, you!" shouted the fan girl while throwing her Chibi Kurama key chain at him.

"You hit me with me! I feel so insulted!" wailed Kurama.

Meanwhile the fan girl was hugging a struggling Chibi Hiei, and Chibi Kurama was sitting at Kurama's feet hugging the key chain.

Kurama looked down and said, "I keep getting smaller, and my mentality goes with it!"

Chibi Kuwabara was picking his nose idly. Chibi Yusuke was supposedly observing his surroundings and read the chains box:

"Lead chains? Big Ones, I don't think you'll be able to get out of there."

The fan girl's friend asked "How did you get out of the duct tape, Kurama?"

Her eyes never left the internet page she was looking at.

"…uhh… I don't really know," was all Kurama could say because he truly didn't know.

"Oh well, I'll take the duct tape off all of you," said the fan girl's friend as waved her hand and the duct tape disappeared.

Hiei suddenly shouted "Leave. Him. ALONE!"

"Are you talking to me, Dragon-Boy?" asked the fan girl.

"Exactly!" shouted Hiei.

"Fine!" she said as she let go of the chibi which ran away immediately.

"Dragon of the Darkness Flame!" shouted the miniaturized Hiei as a little black lizard crawled from behind him.

Every one, except Hiei and the chibis, were laughing, but Hiei was trying real hard not to laugh. The chibis were frightened.

Yusuke shouted, "Haha! Real threatening, Hiei!"

"Give…Him…A break…He's…A chibi," said Hiei, putting a lot of effort into talking without laughing.

"Spaz!" said the fan girl's friend as a small grey cat walked into the room.

"Kitty!" said the fan girl happily.

"May. I. See. CAT!" shouted Kuwabara.

Everyone else sweat dropped.

The fan girl's friend said, "No, not yet, the lizard shall be much fun for Spaz."

Spaz ate the lizard, and Hiei swung into Yusuke who hit Kuwabara who hit Yusuke who hit Hiei who hit Kurama who slammed into the wall. The fan girl shouted, "Ahhh! My baby! Are you okay!"

Kurama replied, "Well I am hanging from your ceiling!"

"Ah, but there you are wrong! It's not my ceiling!"

"It's mine!" said the fan girl's friend.

"Then who's the blonde?" asked Kurama.

"She is my friend, Mandy, and a dedicated fan girl of yours. She is now drooling on your chibi's head. Perhaps you would like to help it," said Mandy's friend as Kurama was magically set free.

"Group hug!" shouted Mandy as she hugged Kurama AND his chibi.

Kurama was frozen stiff with fear. Yusuke was laughing while Chibi Kuwabara was picking his nose and sitting on top of Spaz who was hungrily watching Chibi Hiei try to conjure his Dragon. Chibi Yusuke was missing, and Kuwabara was asleep.

"Where'd I go?" asked Yusuke when he realized his chibi was missing.

"Interesting, there are eight freak shows in my room," said Mandy's friend as she finally looked up from her computer

"You—hehheh—are…right…there…heh…heh," said Hiei.

Mandy heard Hiei and said, "Uh-oh, better not laugh, Dragon-Boy! Don't laugh, Dragon-Boy! You might never hear the end of it!"

Mandy's friend asked, "The big-haired freak show is trying not to laugh; his name is Hiei, right?"

"Hiei is my name. I'm the chibi one…Now back to what I was doing…" said Chibi Hiei who was distracted by the sound of his name.

"The dumb-looking freak show is asleep; didn't you say his name was Kuwabaka, Mandy?" continued Mandy's friend.

"It's close enough," she replied.

"The black-haired freak show is looking for his chibi: his name is Yusuke, right?"

"That's my name, now where am I?" said Yusuke.

Mandy said, "Speaking of Kuwabaka, let's get rid of him."

"Gladly," said Mandy's friend, "the Sahara Desert could always use another human inhabitant."

She opened the window, magically unchained Kuwabara, and barked, "You, follow the cat!"

Spaz leaped out the window followed by Kuwabara and ran through a black hole. Mandy's friend shut the window, and a few seconds later Spaz reappear on Mandy's friend's dresser.

"YAY!" shouted Mandy.

Mandy's friend shouted "MR. FOX DEMON, IT'S TIME TO WAKE UP!" when Kurama hadn't moved in a few minutes, and when Kurama didn't move, she said "Fine, I'll use my mallet," and threw a mallet at Kurama who fell onto Mandy who shouted, "Ooooh! Thank you, Ash! Mine, mine, MINE!"

Ash giggled, pointed at Hiei and said, "Look at the big-hared—Hiei, right?—freak show. He is trying so hard not to laugh that he is as red as a beet."

Mandy looked up and said, "Better not laugh, Dragon-Boy!"

Spontaneously, Yusuke's and Hiei's chains rearranged to the point the chains holding them to the ceiling are around their waists and Yusuke shouted, "Must. Find. Self."

"Fine, I'll let you down," said Ash.

Yusuke was let down and started looking for his chibi until he was hit in the face by Chibi Yusuke's strongest Spirit Gun. Yusuke started crying and Hiei started laughing.

"He is laughing," said Ash with wide eyes that showed her amazement.

"Omigod! Is Dragon-Boy laughing? It's a miracle! Or maybe it's the end of the world…" said Mandy, shifting her eyes around nervously.

"Hey, Mandy, you let go of the fox demon," said Ash with the amazement now showing in her voice as well as on her face.

"I did? Omigod! IT'S THE APOCOLYPSE!" shouted Mandy.

"No, it is not the apocalypse," said Ash in a now irritated vice

"What are you talking about! Hiei laughed for Max's sake!" shouted Mandy.

"I did?" asked Hiei.

Mandy said, "Yes, and now we're all gonna die!"

"No, we are not. Well, technically we all will die eventually, but not now," said Ash as she handed her a Bible and told her to read Revelation.

After Mandy had read the book, she said, "Oh."

"Now do you see that 'tis not Armageddon?"

"But…But…Dragon-Boy laughed!" Mandy whimpered.

"I REALLY don't remember laughing. (Well at least not in a while…)" said Hiei

Mandy knocked on Hiei's forehead and said, "Your brain must be broken or something."

"I don't remember laughing…" Hiei whimpered, "I really don't remember laughing…"

He started to cry.

"Wow!" Mandy exclaimed. "Not only can he laugh, but he can cry too. I didn't even know he had tear ducts."

"Why is my face all wet?" Hiei asked suddenly.

"You were crying," Ash answered him.

"I was?" he asked confusedly. "I don't remember that either."

"Dragon-Boy has amnesia now too?" Mandy said, her head spinning from all the new information.

"Did you know that when one has been possessed, one does not remember what one did while one was possessed?" Ash put in.

"So…Dragon-Boy's not crazy? Darn." Mandy said, disappointed at the loss of a potential companion in insanity.

"Don't go there…yet…" Ash continued. "We don't know if he was possessed or not."

"But…If he's not possessed, then this fan-fic will have no plot!" Mandy yelled at random.

"'Fan-fic'?" Hiei wondered aloud.

"Yeah, this one we're in," Mandy sort of explained, looking around the room. "Hey, where'd Kurama the Hottie go?"

"He is hiding," Ash stated simply.

"Awwwww!" Mandy shouted as she began to search. "Oh, Kurama! Where are you my oh-so-sexy obsession?"

"He is in the closet."

"You are amused by this?" Hiei questioned.

"Quite," Ash said, smirking.

Meanwhile, Many was searching the closet. "I've found you!…I think…no, I haven't. Dammit! Please excuse my French."

"He is somewhere in the shelf, and we both know that's not French," Ash pointed out.

"Yes, it is! What do you know about French!" Many shot back as she moved random objects on the shelf. "There you are you beautiful bastard!" she shouted, hugging Kurama around the neck. "Never leave me again!"

"Oh, jeeze, you really should think about laying off him for a while!" Ash advised her. "He's obviously very frightened of you. If you really want him to love you, let him get to know you first. You don't want him to get to know you as the frightening, obsessive fan girl."

Mandy simply whined.

"Would you like some cheese to go with that whine?" Ash said sarcastically.

"But I want him to love me NOW!" Mandy said impatiently.

"Good for you, but you'll never win his heart acting the way you are acting now," she said, turning to the computer.

"You will strangle him before long." Hiei pointed out as he noticed Kurama turning blue.

"Oh no!" Mandy gasped as she released him, allowing his face to return to its normal color, though it had been a nice shade of teal. "I'm so sorry!" She then backed away for fear of harming him more.

Ash said something in Latin and a cage appeared, trapping Kurama in the cubbyhole shelf.

"What did you do that for?" Mandy complained. "How's he supposed to love me from a cage?"

Just then, the computer began to beep, catching Ash's attention.

"'Tis an IM from Raven…" she announced. "Oy!…"

Mandy hopped down from the shelf and went to the computer. "What's it say?"

"One of Sailor Chaos's followers is loose in one of Tokyo's parks." Ash read.

"Crap," she said, suddenly serious. "Now, of all times?"

"Rainbow Moon Crystal Power!" Ash shouted, activated Quick Transform, which excluded the light show and implied nudity.

"Sirius Crystal Power!" Mandy activated her Quick Transform. The American Sailor Scouts generally prefer Quick Transform, unless they just want to look cool before a fight.

"Come, or die," Sailor New Moon ordered.

"Huh? Come where?" Sailor Sirius wondered. Unlike Sailor Moon, Sailor Sirius didn't magically become smart when she transformed.

"You'd be coming either way," Sailor New Moon said.

"Oh yeah. Well, in any case, couldn't they help us? We might need it," she added, gesturing towards the Yu Yu boys.

"They are who I told to come," Sailor New Moon informed her.

"Ooooh, well I feel stupid…" Sailor Sirius said, realizing this suddenly. "What about Kurama? He's still in a cage.

"Yes, let me out," he called from inside the cage.

"But I just put him in there..." Sailor New Moon protested.

"So what?" the other two said in unison.

Sailor New Moon said some more weird Latin stuff and Kurama was free.

"Yay!" Sailor Sirius exclaimed.

"Help me!" Hiei yelled at random.

"With what?" Sailor Sirius said. "You're perfectly capable of murder!"

"What do you mean?" he said ignorantly.

"You could kill us all if you wanted to!"

"I can?"

"Yessss…" Sailor Sirius said slowly, poking his face.

"Owie!" Hiei cried. "Mommy!"

Sailor Sirius looked at him in shock. "One: your mom's dead; Two WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON!"

"Since when?" Hiei asked in bewilderment.

At this, Sailor Sirius gave up on him completely. "Oh my… For Max's sake; let's just go."

Sailor New Moon on the other hand, still had some questions for the little freak. "Hiei, what year is it?"

"Year is 1993," he answered. "Why?"

"Hiei, I was two in 1993," Sailor Sirius said.

"You're two?" he asked innocently.

"No, she is fourteen," Sailor New Moon corrected. "The year is 2005."

"Idiot Dragon-Boy," Sailor Sirius commented.

"I know what year it is, and I'm no idiot, Stupid Head," "Dragon-Boy" shot back.

"That's the Hiei I know!" Sailor Sirius exclaimed. "Welcome back, Dragon-Boy!"

"I went nowhere, Idiot Girl," came Hiei's reply.

"Who're you calling an idiot! In case you haven't noticed, you're the one tied to the ceiling," Sailor Sirius observed.

Just then, a very s85"

"…possessed Lily. You don't think…?"

"Hiei's been possessed for the last twelve years."

"What do you mean?" asked Kurama.

"But… Hiei's been mean his whole life… and he's like… fifteen… at least," Sailor Sirius said confusedly.

"How else can you explain it?"

"Short-… I mean long- term memory loss?" she suggested.

"Let's go see Raven…" Sailor New Moon said. "Sailor Azarath."

"Right," Sailor Sirius said, nodding in agreement.

Meanwhile, Kuwabara was wandering the Sarah Desert in search of the small grey fuzzball known as Spaz.

"Where'd Kitty go?" he said, looking about. "Kittyyyyy!" he wailed.

Tokyo, 8:00 AM

The monster roared as Sailor Black Rose screamed "Black Roses of Fury!" her best attack which split the monster in two.

"It divided!" Sailor Delta exclaimed.

"Divide and conquer; that's what I always say," added Sailor Black Rose cockily.

"It divided," Sailor Harpy began, "And both halves are as strong as the original which makes it likely that it shall conquer."

"Oops," was all Sailor Black Rose could say.

"Keep it in the park;" cried Sailor Azarath. "We have to wait for New Moon and Sirius!"

Suddenly a light flashed and the words "Chaos Strike" were heard. A black ball of energy engulfed the monster completely, then disappeared in seconds to reveal that it had indeed been destroyed.

Sailor Sirius yelled "Hi!" and waved, causing everyone else to sweatdrop.

"Good ol' Sirius," commented Sailor Black Rose.

"Come on, you stupid chibi," growled Hiei as he yanked on a string connected to his chibi which tried to walk in the other direction.

Chibi Yusuke bounced along in a straight jacket giggling as Yusuke said, "Calm down, little guy, you're gonna hurt yourself"

Chibi Kurama, the only one who was actually behaving, simply hummed contentedly in Kurama's arms.

"How did we get to Tokyo in 0.00000000000000000000000000000000000000000000001 seconds?" Kurama wondered aloud.

"Magic," Sailor Sirius responded with wide eyes as Time Zone music from nowhere began to play.

"New Moon! Sirius!" Sailor Azarath exclaimed worriedly.

"Yessam?" Sailor Sirius responded, bending over backwards in order to see her.

"Someone here is possessed!"

"I was right!" shouted New Moon.

"So Dragon-Boy's possessed?" said Sirius. "Yay, we have a plot!"

"What in the censored existence are you talking about?" said Black Rose, just before a random anvil fell on her head.

"Never mind," Sirius said.

"Do NOT use that language in front of people younger than you!" New Moon scolded.

"I can say that I want, when I want, and in front of whoever I want!" Black Rose shot back, despite the effects of the anvil.

"Whomever," corrected New Moon.

"Who cares!"

"I do!"

"What authority do you have!"

"I was Princess Serenity's younger sister."

"WAS being the key word."

"Children, children, please," Sirius put in. "Be quiet and let the grown-ups handle things."

"Rhea, Azarath, Harpy, and Alpha are the only ones here older than me," Black Rose pointed out.

"I— " New Moon began.

"Die," Black Rose said.

"Eep!" Sirius yelped, diving behind Kurama. "Please don't hurt me!"

New Moon used Pluto's Dead Scream, causing Black Rose extreme pain.

"Why did you do that!" Sailor Rhea shouted over Black Rose's screams.

"Stay out of this," Black Rose ordered her, once she was done screaming.

"But she—"

"Are you asking to die?" Black Rose growled.

"Now you're sounding like you're boyfriend," said New Moon.

"Don't drag Joey into this!" Black Rose whispered.

"Stop fighting, you guys!" Sirius pleaded, hugging Kurama's arm in terror. "Sailor Scouts are supposed to be allies at the very least!"

"Stay out of this, you stupid girl!" yelled Black Rose.

"I created you, Lily Kaiba!" Sirius shouted back as her eyes filled with tears. "You should be thankful!" She then began sobbing into Kurama's shoulder.

"Umm…" said Kurama as he silently screamed for help.

Sirius, totally oblivious, threw her arms around his neck, this time without strangling him.

"What boyfriend?" Black Rose said innocently.

"Don't lie," said New Moon.

"Who says I'm lying?"

"You ARE lying."

"No, I am not."

"Then what's that make of Joey, If he's not your boyfriend!"

"But, you have to go out with him!" Sirius shouted through her tears. "If you don't, you'll only die sooner."

"Where—? Who—? How do you know about him?" Black Rose said in bewilderment.

"I told you! I am your creator! I know everything about you!"

"Not you," said Black Rose.

"She only knows about you because of me," Sirius said.

"Wha-What do you mean?" stuttered Black Rose.

"You're a fictional character," New Moon said.

"But, I'm real," Black Rose observed.

"You are now," Sirius added.

"What do you mean 'now'?"

"None of you, except Mandy and me, were real before Mandy and I realized our powers," New Moon began. "We used our powers to bring you, your friends, some of your rivals, and others to life. When you were created, you were told that you weren't originally real."

"You must have forgotten," offered Sirius.

"How could anyone forget something like that?" Rhea asked.

"I dunno, but I did," Black Rose said simply.

"Use correct English!" New Moon scolded.

Sailor Black Rose: What do you mean "English"? We're speaking Japanese.

"Apparently, something having to do with our powers lets us understand each other even though we are speaking different languages," New Moon explained. "But, still…"

"I think that's enough, New Moon," said Azarath.

"Fine…" said New Moon reluctantly, looking around the park. "Where's Tuxedo Mirage?"

"I haven't seen him all week," Sailor Delta realized.

"Joey and I went by the Kame Game Store earlier," said Black Rose. "He wasn't there… Come to think of it Mr. Mutou wasn't there either…"

"Then where is he?" asked New Moon.

"Here I am," Tuxedo Mirage announced as he appeared in a flash of light.

"Where have you been!" shouted New Moon.

"Grandpa is moving his shop to somewhere in Texas," he informed her. "I should be there now."

"Daddy was thinking about moving to Texas too," Black Rose added.

"May we come too?" begged the other Senchi from outside of Texas.

Suddenly, Sailors Moon, Sun, and Io appeared in a burst of light.

"Did I miss anything?" Moon asked.

"Other than everyone expressing that they wanted to go to Texas?" said Sirius.

"Can you take Sailor Sun and Sailor Io with you?" Moon requested.

"Probably, provided Lily's dad pays for them," she responded, leaning against Black Rose expectantly.

"He might…" she said.

"Lily, where are you?" said Seto's voice from somewhere far off.

"I gotta go now," said Moon. "See you!" And she left.

"Transform back, now!" New Moon ordered everyone.

"Raven, can Joey come back now?" Black Rose requested.

"What was he doing here?" said Tuxedo Mirage.

"We were about to have a Senchi meeting," said Delta.

That doesn't tell me why they were here."

"He found out about our powers," she explained.

"Transform back, NOW!" New Moon said again.

Everyone immediately transformed back into their original forms as Joey appeared from a black hole. "What'd I miss?" he said.

"We're going to America, big brother," said Serenity excitedly.

"Oooo-kaaaay," he said.

At that moment, Seto Kaiba appeared in the clearing in which the detransformed Senchi were standing. "LILY BARBIE KAIBA, WHERE THE HELL HAVE YOU BEEN! I've been so worried. You say you're going to a park, and a monster attacks the park that you say you would be . Don't you ever scare me like that again!"

"DON'T EVER USE THAT censored NAME AGAIN!" she screamed, as the random anvil appeared again, and fell on her once more. She got up again and added, "Especially not in front of my American friends, but I would prefer that you do not use it at all…"

"What's Barbie?" asked Joey.

Suddenly, Lily began to melt. "Heeelp! I'm melting!" Soon, there was a Lily-shaped puddle where she had been standing.

"What the heck happened?" said Mandy.

Lily then walked out from behind some trees. "It's a sort of self-destruct mechanism I was born with. Every time my middle name is said twice within five minutes, I melt."

"Whoa," said Mandy, sounding a lot like Keaneu Reaves.

"Well, anyway, wanna go shoot some pool?" Lily suggested, as though all was normal.

"Sure!" Mandy agreed.

"Hey!" shouted Joey. "What about my question!"

"I can show you a bunch of Barbies," Ash offered, "but I don't have any with me, and if I had my way, I probably wouldn't be able to show you any Barbies." This caused Lily to melt again, only to reappear a couple of seconds later.

"In the meantime, let's go to the pool hall before I forget the idea I had," said Mandy. "I wanna use this lampshade." She held up a lampshade featuring several versions of female Hiei, some of which were blonde and wearing pink.

"You've been carrying that around with you?" Ash said in amazement.

"Is there something wrong with that?" Mandy wondered.

"What the censored is that?" said Hiei, as the anvil fell on him as well.

"It's a lampshade, Ding-dong," answered Mandy.

"No, the thing on it," he said.

"Oh!" Mandy shouted excitedly. "Why, it's a couple female pictures of you, Dragon-boy!"

As Hiei began seething, Kurama randomly became a hippie. "Whoa, dude, Hiei, like… chill… just go with the flow, man…" he said.

"I CANT TAKE IT ANY MORE!" Ash screamed. "AKU RYO TAI SAN!" She hurled a flaming scroll at Hiei.

"Eek! Ash's gonna kill us!" Mandy yelped, as she grabbed Kurama's hand and ran to the pool hall.

"Ack! There are two of me!" Possessor Hiei yelled, and ran after Mandy.

"Oh no!" Ash exclaimed.

"What?" said Yugi.

"Mandy told me that she wanted to get Kurama drunk…" said Ash. "That's what the lampshade's for… I'm sure she's gonna get drunk too… she might get the possessor Hiei—"

"Here!" Hiei yelled.

"—drunk too…Where are the chibis?"

Just then, Chibi Hiei began hiccuping, as Chibi Kurama laughed stupidly while wearing a lampshade.

"Oh my gosh! They're already drunk!" Ash said.

"Yipe!" shouted Yusuke. "We're all gonna die!"

"Going to, no we are not going to die," Ash said to him. "What time is it in the Woodlands, Texas right now?"

"I left at some point after 1:00 AM," said Yugi.

"Follow the string to find Rei-Hiei!" sang Chibi Hiei.

Meanwhile at the bar, Mandy was singing and dancing on a pool table with a drunken Kurama. "Spongebob Squarepants! Spongebob Squarepants! Spongebooooob Squarepaaaaants!"

"What are we singing about anyway?" asked Kurama as he put an arm around her.

"I dunno," she said. "Who cares!"

"Oh my God! It's a smurf!" yelled Rei-Hiei, pointing at a corner.

At the sound of the word "smurf," Mandy screamed, causing many of the bar-goers who were not yet drunk to stare at her.

"I dun see no smurf…" said Kurama. "Where'd it go?"

"Kill it!" she screamed. "I'm afraid of smurfs…"

Back at the park, Joey was asking who Rei-Hiei was.

"HE IS THE ONE WHO POSSESSED ME!" Hiei yelled, then adding quietly, "He was actually quite nice to me…"

"Damage can be done… Lots of damage… Need… Stop… Damage…" said Ash, rocking back and forth on the grass. "'Tis coming… soon… big…" Suddenly she stood and yelled, "RAINBOW MOON CRYSTAL POWER!", transforming into Sailor New Moon.

"Oooohh! Who lives in a pineapple under the sea!" Chibi Kurama sang.

"Spongebob Squarepants!" Chibi Hiei answered.

"Chaos Strike!" New Moon yelled.

"Owie…" said Chibi Hiei.

"Hey, I can't move… How am I supposed to dance like this?" Chibi Kurama protested.

At the same time, back in the ba asked.

"Are you kidding?" Mandy yelled. "I'm afraid of smurfs! But… Maybe David can do it…" She shifted her eyes around once more as David Risley appeared in a flash of white light.

"Who's he?" asked Kurama.

"Why it's David the smurf-catcher!" Mandy explained.

"You invited another guy on our date?" Kurama said.

"What are you talking about?" said Mandy confusedly.

"I asked you out; don't you remember?" Kurama said.

"No."

"But… but… I LOVE YOU!" he wailed.

"Oh, well in that case, I could be persuaded to remember…" Mandy said mischeviously.

Back at the park, another monster appeared.

"It's a monkey!" yelled Chibi Kurama. "I wanna hug it…"

"How dare you?" said Raven.

"How dare I what?" asked New Moon.

"Shut up and transform!" Lily yelled. "Black Rose Crystal Power!" Immediately, she used her Black Rose chain to encircle the monkey-monster with a chain of black rose pendants.

"Aww… I wanted to hug it!" complained Chibi Kurama.

"Hug it quickly! It must be destroyed!" New Moon commanded him.

"Yay!" he yelled, and grabbed hold of its tail.

"Stop being gay, you – er – freakish –um – miniature Kurama-clone-thing-a-ma-bob!" Yusuke yelled at him.

Back at the bar thing, Kurama said "What do you mean by 'persuaded'?"

"Are you kidding?" said Mandy. "I'm drunk! Can't you think of anything?"

"Well even if I could tihink of anything, I couldn't do it because I'm paralyzed!" he pointed out.

"Oh yeah… maybe I can un-paralyze you…" she offered, and attempted to help him, somehow breaking one of his bones in the process. "Oops. Sorry!"

"I didn't feel it anyway," he said.

"Wow, are you really that drunk?" Mandy marveled.

"I dunno…"

Suddenly, Mandy yelled "HI!" as some strange drunken man appeared.

"Greetings, fellow Earthlings, how are you this fine night?" he said, before collapsing.

"It's day you freak," said Kurama to the lump on the floor.

Mandy on the other hand stuck her foot in the air and said, "Bob the Sock says hi."

"Oh great sock! I am not worthy of your greetings!" Rei-Hiei said, bowing down.

"Ow! Owie! Owie!" Kurama yelled at random.

"Did you just start feeling that broken bone?"

Later outside the pool hall, bar, thingy, Yusuke was bursting into a room. "I heard Kurama scream in pain!" Everyone except Yugi, Sailor New Moon, and Seto, followed Yusuke into the building.

"Miser Kaiba, you need to keep… stop many of them from getting drunk," said New Moon.

"I don' wanna!" he complained.

"Do it or die," New Moon commanded.

"How?" said Seto.

"Pay the bartender to kick them out."

"How much?"

"How should I, an American with almost no understanding of anything Japanese, know how much yen to pay the bartender to kick a bunch of teens out of a bar? Haggle with him! That's the only advice I can give! Why the heck are you asking me this!" New Moon said all at once.

"Fine!" said Kaiba, giving up and walking into the bar.

"Hi Daddy!" said Lily. "Oi! I'm already drunk. Cool!"

"Lily Barbie Kaiba, you're too young to drink beer, champagne or wine!" he exclaimed.

"I got drunk on Coke," she responded.

"How is that possible?" David asked her. "Coke's not alcoholic."

"If you buy it in a bar, it's alcoholic."

"I thought we were in a pool hall."

"We are."

"How can we be in both?"

"The bar is in the pool hall."

"I understand now… I think… Do I understand?"

"Ack! It moved!" Rei-Hiei yelled.

"It really is a smurf!" Mandy screamed. "Kill it! Kill it! Kill it!"

"Smurfs aren't real," Kaiba said matter-of-factly.

"They are too!" Mandy argued. "Here, have a drink." She then handed him a large glass of some alcoholic beverage.

Kaiba finished the drink in one gulp, then said, "Who's paying for these drinks?"

"I think it's on my tab," Lily said.

"How long is your tab?" asked a random guy.

"I don't know," she said. "I think the bartender lost part of it a while ago… Here have another drink, Daddy," she then gave Seto a gigantic Bloody Mary, which he also downed in one gulp.

"I challenge you to a duel!" Joey yelled. "When I'm not drunk… Here Kaiba drink this… It's good for you. (Not!)" He handed Kaiba his 3rd glass of large alcoholic beverage which he downed in one gulp.

"If you wanna loose, Mutt, I'll accept," he said, drinking his 4th through 8th large glasses of alcoholic beverage in one gulp each. "My head hurts!"

"Welcome to the Drunk Side!" Rei-Hiei announced.

Outside, Sailor New Moon was playing "Minuet 1" on her violin with her music floating in front of her.

"Kaiba's taking forever!" said Yugi.

"No problem with that as long as he gets his job done," said New Moon as she continued playing.

"The music's beautiful, Ash," muttered Yugi

Sailor New Moon finished playing "Minuet 1" and said, "No, it really isn't all that pretty. It was actually quite awful. Billions of people can play better than I am."

She stowed her violin in subspace and retrieved a boom box with a CD of the pieces her school's orchestra played during the final concert of her sixth grade year.

"If they're not out by the time this track is over, I'm gonna go in there and drag them out!" growled Yugi with a hint of anger in his voice.

Sailor New Moon said, "You don't have to do that. Once this sequence of five tracks that are all part of this one piece, 'Medieval Scenes,' there's a particular spring in China that I wanna drop Rei-Hiei into… We're all going there once it's over."

Inside the bar

"I see you take after your mother, Yusuke," said Kurama with a small laugh once he noticed that Yusuke was drunk out of his mind.

"Oooh, I don't feel so good…" muttered Rei-Hiei as he ran to the restroom.

"I guess he couldn't hold his liquor," laughed Mandy as Yusuke started doing some stupid dance.

"Everybody do the—" he shouted before he ran into the wall and shouting, "Ow!"

Outside, Sailor New Moon's boom box finished playing the last sequence of "Medieval Scenes."

China, Juensko Springs

"What are we doing here? My head hurts…" groaned Rei-Hiei just before he was pushed into Spring of Drowned Girl.

"Oops!" cried Yusuke as he stepped toward the spring. "Sorry! My mistake let me—"

"Don't step in any spring," said Sailor New Moon in a semi-amused voice. "If you do, you will be cursed into becoming whatever drowned in that spring last whenever you are splashed with cold water. That's Spring of Drowned Girl."

"Yipe!" gasped Yusuke as he jumped away from the spring and nearly falling into another that was near it.

Rei-Hiei swam the shore; and once he stood up on the bank, he found almost everyone staring at him.

"What?" asked Rei. " Why's everyone staring at me?"

"Uhhh… Mandy…" asked Kurama, "How many alcoholic beverages did you give me? Hiei's become a girl!"

"I lost count at 600, and he is a girl," said Mandy. Hey, Blac, if you gave Kurama 600 drinks, why isn't he dead?

Suddenly, a mysterious creature came plummeting through the air and landed in Spring of Tiny Drowned Phoenix. Soon another creature did the same, only it landed in Spring of Drowned Purple Telletubbie.

"Boiling water for you!" said Sailor New Moon in an unusually cheerful voice as she dumped the boiling water from the huge pot she was carrying on the two creatures that had just appeared. The tiny phoenix turned into Mandy's bodyguard, Kage; and the telletubbie turned into Ash, Mandy, and Kage's 7th grade science teacher, Ms. Clark.

"What are you doing here?" said Mandy. "I thought I sent you to the ends of the Eart as punnishment!"

"What for?" asked Sailor New Moon.

"He owes me a penny for a Powerade."

"That makes no sense… Hey! I thought you were drunk!" said New Moon as Ms. Clark smacked Mandy upside the head.

"Oh No!" shouted Kage, "She followed me here!"

"They threw us out at the same time, buffoon!" shouted Ms Clark.

"They did?" asked Kage in a disbelieving voice.

"It's around three AM in America right now…" noted Sailor New Moon to herself.

Poof!

Outside some fancy new hotell in Spring, Texas, 3 AM, Female Rei-Hiei asked, "What are we doing here?" as she looked around and said "Where is here?"

"We are in Texas. If you don't have a place to go, Mr. Kaiba will pay for your stay here," informed Sailor New Moon. (Kage and Mrs. Clark are at their own houses)

Poof!

Kurama, Mandy, Yugi, and Sailor New Moon are outside St. Luke's Hospital. "Why are we at a hospital?" asked Kurama.

Mandy said "I broke some unknown bone of yours when we were drunk."

Sailor New Moon asked "How did I know that?"

"Whoa… deep…"

"Since you broke a bone, you need to go into the ER."

Kurama shouted, "I'm not going in there, and you can't make me!"

Sailor New Moon said, "You're still paralyzed."

Mandy said, "How'd we get all the way here? Confusion!"

"I'm still in my Senshi form. I can still use my magic. You figure it out," said New Moon as she leaned against a wall.

"Aw, you make life so hard!" wailed Mandy.

"Think. I used the word in a sentence."

"But you also used the word 'think,'" saud Mandy as she clutched her head. "Ow. It hurts!"

"Two sentences before that one," said New Moon as she smirked.

"'I'?"

"After that."

"Umm… 'can'?"

"Three words after that."

"Oooohhh! 'Magic'."

"You finally got it right!… Are you sure you're not drunk?"

"No, but I ain't complaining."

"'AIN'T' IS NOT A WORD! 'No, you are not sure,' or 'No, you are not drunk'?"

"Don't complain about my grammar, I might be drunk!"

Sailor New Moon said, "'Tis time to go to the hospital."

Later, Kurama needed to be left in the hospital. Mandy insisted upon going with him, but Ash wouldn't let her. Sailor New Moon said "We were never supposed to leave my parents' apartment, and we wouldn't have if it weren't for the monster! We have to go back!"

"But, Ash, I can't leave him!" wailed Mandy as she super glued herself to Kurama. "See?"

Sailor New Moon grabbed Mandy's collar and forcefully said, "Come on!

"Never!" wailed Mandy as she squeezed Kurama's arm until it turns blue. "You can't make me!"

A nearby nurse said "You need to let go of his arm. If you don't, his arm will need to be amputated due to lack of oxygen!"

Mandy hugged him and said, "Is that better?"

"'Tis time to go!" said New Moon as she teleported herself, Mandy, and Yugi to apartment building's parking lot.

"Noooooo! What have you done!" wailed Mandy as she collapsed into hysterical tears.

"You have somewhere to be right, Yugi?" asked Sailor New Moon.

"I can walk there from here," answered Yugi.

Sailor New Moon smiled and said, "OK, 'bye!" before she teleported herself and Mandy to Ash's room.

Mandy was still sobbing as Sailor New Moon said, "The clock reads 5:00 AM."

Mandy screamed, "What do I care! You took me from my Kurama!"

"He can leave the hospital at noon," said New Moon in a voice that a kindergarten teacher may use to explain to a student that one plus one equaled two.

"But I wanna see him now!" wined Mandy as Sailor New Moon detransformed.

"Oh, well…" said Ash, "Twenty-four hours… I'm tired."

"Strangely, I'm not," said Mandy, who had seemed to have perked up a bit, "Beware, Ash, I know where the shaving cream is!"

"There is no shaving cream in this apartment, and teleporting every few minutes and being in Sailor form for hours is very tiring…" said Ash as she barely suppressed a small smile.

"Well," said Mandy, "Even if there is no shaving cream, I still have a Magic Marker."

"Give it to me or you shall spend eternity trapped in a tiny cage in the Sahara Desert with Kuwabara."

"Oh God, no! don't lock me up with that freak of nature! Here, you can have it!" said Mandy as she gave the marker to Ash.

"Leave me alone and let me sleep or I will follow through with my threat…" said Ash as she collapsed onto her bed.

"Man, she's no fun…" Mandy pouted as Matt walked in, kicked Mandy, and ran off.

"Hey, come back here!" Mandy shouted as she started to chase him.

Approximately 12 hours later, Ash was sitting on her bed messing with her computer which happened to be a Windows 95 and really slow when Mandy walks into the room leaving the door open behind her.

"Where have you been?" Ash asked her.

Mandy replied, "I was chasing Matt… until I got lost and found myself at St. Luke's. I decided to pick up Kurama… Apparently he broke a nothing… he didn't break anything… I brought him here… Is that all right?"

"I guess," said Ash.

Kurama walked into room and asked, "Shouldn't you be asking—what's your name again?"

"My name is Ash Cochran," she replied.

"Shouldn't you be asking Ash's parents that question?"

Mandy said, "Our parents are on a three-week cruise in the Bahamas. By the way, Yugi's here too."

Yugi walked into the room and said, "You need to go to the grocery store. Your pantry is empty."

"HEB is in walking distance," said Ash.

At HEB, Kurama was hiding behind anything that would stand still long enough, and Mandy asked, "What on Earth are you doing?"

"What does it look like I'm doing? I'm avoiding fangirls," answered Kurama.

"If you're attacked by fangirls, I can summon Rei-Hiei and pour cold water on him, said Ash

"Yeah, the majority of your fangirls like Hiei too… female Hiei…" said Mandy before having a giggle-fit.

Suddenly, some teenage girl shouted, "Hey, look it's Kurama!" and girls start attacking Kurama. There were about 1000 of them.

"Crazed fangirls! Run for your LIIIIIIVES!" shouted Kurama as Rei-Hiei appeared out of thin air.

Some teenage girl shouted, "It's Hiei!"

Mandy threw a huge bucket of water on Rei-Hiei and shouted "Female Rei-Hiei!" before chucking Rei-Hiei into the mob of fangirls, grabbing Kurama and running off.

"Yugi, could you get the groceries?" Ash asked as she handed him a list and money enough to pay for all the groceries. "Someone has to keep them from getting themselves lost."

She transformed and teleported away.

In H.E.B. girls' restroom a few minuets later, Kurama was sitting in the corner looking quite shaken up at the fact that he had been turned into a girl. Mandy cried "What have they done to you?" and threw her arms around Kurama. She then said, "My love! Don't worry, I'll find way to turn you back!"

Sailor New Moon said, "Don't worry, the instant spring of drowned girl only works once."

Kurama asked, "What's that?"

Mandy said "I didn't hear anything."

Sailor New Moon muttered to herself, "The hot water's turned on, no one else is in here, the door is locked. They'll be safe while I get the groceries."

She teleported away.

At the Hotel, Lily walked into the room with blood on her clothes.

"What happened to you, Lily?" asked Téa

"I got in a fight with the bus boy. How was your day?" asked Lily in return.

"What! We haven't even been here for twenty-four hours yet!"

"Yeah, I know, I can't even walk down the hall without getting into a fight. Ridiculous, isn't it?"

"Don't you care about how other people feel?"

" Not really. He started it anyway. How can you live without a good fist fight or two!"

"Because I care about other people's feelings!"

"Well, if you didn't, you'd have a lot more fun, now wouldn't you?"

Hiei said, "Toy boat, twoy boit, toy bwote… argh!"

"Oh, shut up!" said Lily as she kicked Hiei.

"Hey, don't kick him!" said Téa, "He didn't do anything to you!

"Yes he did," said Lily, "he was annoying me!"

"Owwww… that huuuurt!" said Hiei as he started crying.

Somewhere, Seto Kaiba was walking down the street until he came upon a little kid on a tricycle.

"Hey kid," said Seto "will you let me borrow that weird contraption of yours?"

The kid shouted, "It's MINE, MINE, MINE!"

"Give it now! This is the one scene I get to myself, and you're NOT gonna ruin it! Now hand over the stupid contraption!"

"If it's stupid, why do you want it?"

Silence… a few birds chirp

"Because I said so!" said Seto as he grabbed the trike and attempted to pull it away from the kid.

The kid was still holding on to his tricycle shouting "MINE, MINE, MINE, MINE!"

"What are you, kid, some kind of muscle builder?"

The kid's shirt ripped and he said, "Does this answer your question, mister?"

Seto: narrowed his eyes and kicked kid "Nope."

He rode away triumphantly on stolen tricycle and started laughing maniacally.

Thirty minutes and one block later…

"Shut up, Kid! Goddamit!" said Seto as the trike tipped over.

"Mommy, Mommy, Mommy, he said that bad word you divorced Daddy over!"

Kid's mother came out of the house with two hundred machine guns on her back

"SHIT!" shouted Seto as he zoomed away on motortrike.

"He figured out how to work the engine! Run away before he figures out how to use the laser gun," said the kid.

A laser flashed and house melted.

"He found out how to work the laser!" shouted the kid as he started sceaming.

They all ate cheese, went to Disney World, did some adulty things, and lived happily went to the third part.

AEC1990: Geez, Cory, don't write when you're not wanted.

BlacVlvtn: Write on your own notebook! sticks out tongue

Random Author Cory: It's mine now. _They came back from part three and skipped to part two while frolicking the yellow brick road._

AEC1990: Hey, people reading our story, forget the last few lines while we continue with the story from before the idiot Cory, no offense, wrote his idiotic know-nothing-not-needed writings!

Seto: I'm sorry; I'm sorry; I'm sorry! Did I annoy you Miss Ashley and Miss Amanda? You usually allow other authors coming and writing their thoughts.

AEC1990: Sorry readers we are ending this chapter now, but if you continue reading, you can read some of our ridiculous… uhh… discussions… I'm not allowing him to write because he's trying to end our story before it should be ended.

Seto: That know-nothing git is trying to end my part! starts bawling

BlacVlvtn: It's another sign of the Apocalypse! Run for cover!

AEC1990: It's not the Apocalypse!

BlacVlvtn: Yes it is!

AEC1990: No it's not!

Téa: You'll mess up the story if you continue arguing!

BlacVlvtn: What are you doing here? This is author discussion period.

Joey: Any of us can join your discussion period! We're helping with the story too!

BlacVlvtn: Maybe so, but AEC1990 and me are the only authors here! All characters… deep breath OUT!

AEC1990: What about the random authors?

BlacVlvtn: I guess they can come… Shouldn't we be listening to Mrs. Adams? This is a class period…

AEC1990: I was listening, and I'm prepared for my final. I read the whole packet last night.

BlacVlvtn: Really? I haven't done a thing… for any of my finals… least of all art! It's such a gimme class! Like Choir and P.E.…

AEC1990: My mom made me. I wouldn't have, I mean I've already taken an art final… last year. But still! We probably did more vocabulary in that class than we did art projects. And we watched a whole bunch of movies with that nun lady… I don't know her name. Sister M or something like that. It stated with an M, that's all I know!

BlacVlvtn: Yikes… art vocab. And this is coming from a human spellchecker!

AEC1990: We had to define fresco and such. And Madonna!

BlacVlvtn: How many people put something about the singer?

AEC1990: I dunno, but a Madonna is a picture portraying the virgin Mary as Jesus' mother.

BlacVlvtn: Ah, religious junk.

Lily: to readers Psssst, Blac's an atheist.

BlacVlvtn: What are you doing here? Get out!

Lily: What are you, my mother?

BlacVlvtn: Well, in a way, yes.

AEC1990: shows her _Lily of the Black Rose_ on"fan fiction. net."What in the censored existence is this?

BlacVlvtn: Your life story. Which _I_ wrote.

AEC1990: That she did.

Lily: Stop the insanity, everybody please!

END CHAPTER 1


	2. Part I, Chapter II

Disclaimer

See previous chapter. We're too lazy to type it again. Besides, a disclaimer should apply to the whole fic, not just one chapter.

The Crossover of Insanity

Part I The Start of an Odd Summer Break

Chapter 2 She Chose!

by AEC1990 and BlacVlvtn

A laser flashed as the house melted in a mess of red goo and smoke. "He found out how to work the laser!" shouted the kid before screaming. Fortunately, his mother scooped him up and ran away with him in her arms.

"Memo to self," Seto mused, "return contraption and buy kid a new house."

He continued on his way to the bank to exchange currencies.

­­­

At HEB, the dark moon Senchi and the king of game's hikari had finished their grocery shopping. Ash stood in front of the door to the ladies' room calling to the two she knew would be locked in. "Mandy, Kurama, the fangirls are gone and it's time to take the groceries back to the apartment, so get out! " she called. "Oh, and Mandy, remember last night's threat? If you don't come out, I _will_ carry through with it."

"Fine!" Mandy said as she opened the door. "Just don't lock me up with the Kuwabaka!"

The two emerged from the bathroom, but Kurama was no longer a girl, as he had been when he had been locked in the bathroom. "Good," Ash said. "Now why don't you tell us exactly why Kurama's a guy again?"

"I stuck his head under the faucet and turned it on," said Mandy, thinking it obvious.

"And, why did you do that while in the girls' restroom?"

"Well, where was I supposed to do it?" answered the Senchi of the Dog Star, clueless.

"Think about it." Ash sighed. "Is there supposed to be guys in the girl's bathroom."

"Well, yeah, but there's not supposed to be girls in the guys' bathroom either, and when we went in we were both girls. Made sense to me," she answered.

"Yes, but guys can't leave the girl's bathroom either. It just doesn't make sense for a girl to enter the bathroom and a guy to leave it; either way, he was in the bathroom as a guy."

Mandy was starting to get confused. "Ow… you gave me a headache!" She clutched her head in agony.

Kurama put his arm around Mandy's shoulders before telling Ash not to give Mandy a migraine. Ash, surprised that the red-head knew her name inquired into this. The kitsune told her that Mandy had told him. Ash, thinking he was still afraid of Mandy, mentioned her thought. Kurama told Ash that he thought Mandy was actually quite pathetic. Mandy then informed Kurama that she wasn't deaf before complaining that her head still hurt and asking for Tylenol.

Ash, still thinking Kurama's sudden change in attitude towards Mandy not entirely possible, asked Mandy, "What did you do? No one can go from being scared to the point they won't move to being brave enough to talk to the person who frightened them in one night without any influence of any kind!"

"I didn't do anything!" Mandy defended herself.

"I told you, she's just pathetic," Kurama stated.

"What did she do?" Ash asked again, still not trusting the answers she was given.

Mandy burst into tears after saying, "I didn't do anything!"

Kurama pointed at Mandy saying "And that's about it" before sweat dropping. Blac: Yes you did. Congrats!

"I don't think it's possible to cry for three hours," Ash stated, her disbelief plain in her voice

"Well, no, but let's just say I saw her vulnerable side," said Kurama.

Suddenly Ash noticed something odd in the store. "Why is Shrek in HEB?" she asked.

Mandy looked up and asked, "Shrek? Where?"

"Behind you, by the entrance," Ash pointed.

"That's a poster…" Mandy said.

"I know, but why is it here of all places?"

Three hours later, the four had returned to the hotel find themselves in the midst of chaos.

"Aa-ash," Misti complained. "You left my brother in Japan, can you go get him?"

"Yes, I have the physical ability to go get him, but—" Ash started.

"Would ya please go get him? Pa-leeeze?" Misti begged.

Ash glared for a moment before consenting with a sharp "Fine!" She disappeared with a puff of smoke to reappear minutes later in same fashion with Ryou Bakura. Misti glomped her brother and pulled on the Millennium Ring playfully showing her happiness at having her twin, her other half, back in her company. Unfortunately, Ryou didn't share her happiness. Perhaps it had something to do with the fact that he knew the thief king would probably notice Misti's Senchi powers sooner if they stayed in such close confines, and it was likely that Misti could probably be as good of a host to Bakura as Ryou was. Blac: I think so, provided everyone knows the thief king's name is Bakura.

"Where's Tristan?" Joey demanded. "I must tell Tristan about today and vent my anger and such!"

"Find some other way to vent your feelings!" Ash snapped. "It's bad enough as it is!"

Ash started ticking off her annoyances with each of the members of the group without actually mentioning their names, every once in a while muttering something unheard that didn't necessarily seem to be one of her list of grievances ending her list with a groan of anger and a shout of "I am NOT going to get that-that monkey boy!"

"Who are you calling an insensitive jerk!" Seto asked, entering a foul mood himself.

"Why, Mr. Kaiba, I believe I called you an insensitive jerk," answered Ash in a tone of mock-sweetness before continuing, "During the Battle City semi-finals, when Joey was attacked by Ra, he needed professional help in a _real_ hospital. You cared more about your little _tournament_ and regaining the title of king of games that you did not even consider the fact that Joey might die! How often do you even _think_ about people outside your immediate family!"

"Hey!" Joey complained. "Why are you calling me a jerk?"

"You want me to reconsider?" Ash asked with the same tone of mock-sweetness she had used before.

"Yeah!" Joey answered defiantly.

"Okay, you're a know-nothing twit," she said "Is that better?"

Yugi, noticing Ash's anger pulled her aside and asked her to calm down. She exhaled slowly and apologized for her rude actions before sighing. Yugi noticed this and quietly asked if something was bothering her. He tilted her head up to look at him. His eyes were full of concern. Ash told him that she was fine and that she was just feeling a little bit under the weather. Yugi apologized, but Ash was quick to reprimand him for apologizing for something that was not his fault.

"It seemed as though you were having a pleasant time at HEB," Yugi said, smirking.

Ash looked strained. "I… I just don't feel well at the moment… Racing around and constant confusion is not fun… It's frustrating. I just needed to vent some anger," She didn't quite meet Yugi's eyes when she said this, but she then continued, "I'm not going to go get Tristan unless you give me a _very_ good reason to get him. It takes too much energy teleporting multiple times in one hour." She glanced at the wall clock and said something about going home.

"I'll take you," Yugi offered.

"Thanks, Yugi," replied Ash.

Just before Ash and Yugi left, Yusuke asked about Rei-Hiei's whereabouts. Mandy started to beam for no reason as she said, "A bunch of fan girls carried him off."

At seven AM that Saturday, about 4 days later, Ash sat on the floor in front of an entertainment center housing a television tuned into the local Warner Brothers station, which was running its Kids WB section which was currently airing an all-morning long _Yu-Gi-Oh!_ marathon. A knock was heard at the door just as the show was going to a commercial. Ash stood and opened the door to find that Yugi had come for a visit. After the door slammed shut, Ash shoved Yugi onto the floor in front of the TV telling him something about watching the _Yu-Gi-Oh!_ marathon. Yugi was severely shocked by the fact that he and his friends were the main characters. As the show went to another commercial break, a squeal could be heard issuing from the next room followed by Mandy's shouts of "Omigod, omigod, it's Yoko!"

"I must find out what insanity is going on in there," Ash said before walking into the other room to see Mandy hugging a television monitor with a picture of Yoko Kurama on the screen.

Kurama, who was sitting on the lower bunk of Ash's sibling's bed behind Mandy, said, "You really need to choose…"

"Maybe I'll choose if you transform for me!" Mandy answered with a mischevious smile

"NO!" Kurama near-shouted.

Mandy let go of the TV and stared at the kitsune with puppy-dog eyes. "Pwease?"

"I don't want him to kill anyone…" Kurama replied seriously. "Especially not you."

"Awwww, you're so sweet…" said Mandy. "NOW TRANSFORM DAMMIT!"

Some time during the conversation between Kurama and Mandy, Ash had transformed into Sailor New Moon. New Moon offered to try to keep Kurama from killing anything while in Yoko form. Kurama inquired on how the Senchi of the dark moon would be able to keep a demon from killing anything. New Moon simply pointed out her Senchi abilities.

"Pretty please with sugar on top?" begged Mandy "And sprinkles? And whipped cream? And a cherry?" A/N: That sounds more like a sundae that a begging. --;; 

Kurama again asked if New Moon was sure she could keep Youko from killing anyone while holding Mandy protectively. New Moon told him that there was no way she could give him an accurate answer on the fact that she know nothing about Yoko Kurama, but she did, again, mention her Senchi abilities. Kurama finally agreed to transform before warning that he wouldn't be able to return to his human form until Yoko decided he wanted to return. New Moon then inquired on the effect of sending Yoko to the moon. Kurama answered the question with the answer being death. New Moon asked what made him sure of his answer. Kurama pointed out that there was no oxygen in outer space and a few other factors. New Moon then inquired on how there could have once been a kingdom on the moon. Mandy then jumped in with an answer: "Because mooninites built it!" A/N: We don't own mooninites either. They are taken from Aqua Teen Hunger Force, which we also don't own. 

"Are you calling me a 'mooninite?'" asked the dark moon Senchi.

"I dunno, are you a mooninite?" Mandy replied.

New Moon answered with a random fact about her past life. Mandy then answered, "Then you're a moononite! You should be proud."

"Then are you a 'Sirius-o-nite?'" New Moon laughed.

"Yes!"

"Then what am I?" asked Kurama.

Mandy answered, "You're a… um… I'm not sure…"

New Moon made a comment on the similarities between youma and demons before inquiring on the Senchi's ability to breath outside Earth's atmosphere.

"Uh oh… I feel a headache coming on…" Mandy complained before ordering Kurama to transform into Yoko Kurama.

"All right, all right!" Kurama sighed before transforming.

New Moon told Mandy to calm down, but Mandy answered with "But Aa-ash, it's Yoko! He's sooooooo SEXY!"

"Who are you and what do you want?" Yoko demanded before asking, "Do you have anything shiny I can steal?"

"I'm Mandy, and I want YOU!" Never ask a rabid fan girl what she wants.

"Mandy, I thought you were in love with his other form," said New Moon before throwing an ancient coin at the fox demon's head.

"Can I have both?" Mandy asked as Yoko caught the coin. "Hey, my shiny coin!"

New Moon commented on the illegality of double marriage. Mandy countered with a comment about the amount of stuff that is legal in Nevada but not in other places. New Moon eventually offered Mandy ten shiny coins for choosing which of Kurama's forms she would rather have before New Moon counted to ten.

"TEN shiny coins!" Mandy thought VERY hard, "Okay, I'll try…"

"One," Sailor New Moon began counting.

"They're both equally hot and sexy…" Mandy thought aloud.

"Two."

"They're both REALLY smart…"

"Three."

"Yoko's a thief, which is pretty cool…"

"Four."

"But he might try to steal my shiny collection…"

"Five."

"Shuuichi's really sweet and kind…"

"Six."

"Not to mention, he can cook and likes flowers…"

"Seven."

"And he already loves me…"

"Eight."

"Also, I did promise him…"

"Nine."

"I choose…" Mandy started before pausing as a drum roll played somewhere. "Shuuichi!"

New Moon tossed Mandy the coins she had promised her. Mandy expressed her glee as she pulled a foil-wrapped shoebox from subspace and dropped the coins in.

"Hey, I want shiny coins too!" Yoko pouted.

"I already gave you some," New Moon pointed out, "but I do where you can find a shiny apple."

The dark moon Senchi pulled a map from subspace and handed it to the thief who promptly studied it to find the best route to take to find his shiny apple. Once he found the best route, which took quite a few minutes, which New Moon used to tune the television in the room into _Yu-Gi-Oh!_, the fox demon stood up and strode out the door of the bedroom and through the living room to the door into the apartment. He opened the door and looked around to get a better idea of where he was before plopping down on the couch to make sure his route was accurate.

Yoko stood again as the new episode of _Yu-Gi-Oh!_ was returning from a commercial break. He walked out the front door of the apartment. Mandy followed him shouting, "Hey, I want my Shuuichi back!"

New Moon complained that the show was coming back on and that she wanted to see it. Mandy, then, said something about finding Kurama more important than watching TV. New Moon put a VHS in the VCR and pressed the record button and told Yugi to come along. Yugi transformed into Tuxedo Mirage. Mandy then yelled, "Come back with my Shuuichi!"

They followed the kitsune for five hours until Yoko stopped. The kitsune had found the shiny apple in a small orchard of apple trees. The tree itself had been silver and was giving off a strong magical aura. From the branches of the silver tree, the kitsune gleefully shouted, "I have found the Apple of Shinee!"

"Good for you." New Moon said, yawning. "Now, may we go find somewhere to get a good lunch?"

"Change back, damn you! I want my Shuuichi back!" Mandy shouted at Yoko.

"What do I do with it now?" Yoko mused to himself.

"I'm hungry!" New Moon complained as she leaned against one of the other trees.

Tuxedo Mirage leaned against a tree as well. "I'm hungry too!"

"I want Shuuichi!" Mandy hollered at the tree-borne fox demon.

A few seconds later, New Moon looked in the direction at which Tuxedo Mirage had been leaning against a tree to find that Yugi had de-transformed and switched places with the pharaoh. New Moon greeted Yami Yugi and inquired on the reason of the switch. Atemu simply shrugged and told her that he had no idea why Yugi had decided to return to his soul room.

Yoko jumped from the silver tree landing gracefully a few feet from the trunk. He checked to see if he had harmed the apple in any way. As he turned to walk away, Mandy jumped on his back and started beating him over the head with a mallet she had pulled from subspace shouting "Gimme my Shuuichi!"

Yoko started running around in attempt to throw Mandy off his back, but when it became clear that Mandy would not give up, he asked "Will you stop if I give you my apple?"

New Moon, however, was completely ignoring Mandy and Yoko. She asked the pharaoh if he knew why his high priest's reincarnation was as insensitive as he was. Atemu told the dark moon Senchi that Seto's reason for his insensitivity was not completely known to him but that it may have had something to do with Seto's adoption by Gozaburo.

Mandy started screaming at Yoko. "NO, I DO NOT WANT YOUR STUPID APPLE! NOW GIVE HIM BACK!"

Yoko Kurama, now fed up, changed back to his human form. Kurama instantly took note of his surroundings. "Why are you on my back, and why do I have a shiny apple?"

I'm on your back 'cause I choose you! And Yoko stole the apple," replied Mandy sliding of his back and holding tightly to his arm.

"No, he picked it from the shiny apple tree; there's a difference," said Ash before detransforming. "Now, may we do find something to eat other than shiny apples, which are probably poisonous?"

" Sounds good to me!" said Mandy happily. "How 'bout ramen?"

"Um… Where are we?" asked Kurama.

"I don't know; but if we can decide on a place to go, I can teleport us there," replied Ash.

"I want ramen…" said Mandy.

"I wanna go to Luby's," said Ash.

"Okay, whatever," Mandy replied, "but when we get home, I want ramen!"

"Who's gonna cook it?" asked Ash.

Mandy proudly pointed out Kurama's cooking abilities, and Kurama asked "Why do you take pride in my talents?"

"Well not a lot of guys can, cook can they? I was lucky to get a straight on who knows how," replied Mandy.

"I do not want to make you ramen," Kurama told her.

Mandy made a pouty face and said, "Don't make me smother you in kisses."

"I don't care what kind of threat you make, I am NOT gonna make you ramen," replied Kurama.

"What if I went through with my threat?"

"I still wouldn't make you ramen!"

"Really? Cool!" Mandy tackled Kurama started to smother him in kisses. Kurama made no attempt to stop Mandy.

"And off to Luby's!" said Ash.

Ash proceeded to teleport everyone to the parking lot of a Luby's restaurant. Mandy had yet to stop smothering Kurama with kisses. Bystander Number One asked, "Where'd they come from?"

"I dunno," said Bystander Number Two, "but what is she doing to him?"

"We are numbers!" shouted Bystander Number Three gleefully

"What in the censored existence are you talking about?" demanded Bystander Number Four.

Eight days later, a Sunday, _Inuyasha_ was playing on the television while Mandy was screaming something about ancestry, Raven was working on some weird spell in the kitchen area, Kurama was sitting next to Mandy trying to calm her down, Yugi was trying to teach Ash how to duel, and most everyone else was watching _Inuyasha_. Raven's spell backfired and Inuyasha, Kagome, Miroku, Sango, and Shippo came out of the TV. Mandy jumped to her feet in excitement. She shouted, "Great Ancestor!"

Inuyasha was taken aback by the girl who claimed to be his descendant. He asked, "Who are you?"

Mandy glomped Inuyasha, who then yelled at her to get off him and called her a stupid girl. This caused Mandy to whimper "But, Great Ancestor…" and start crying.

"Why are you crying?" Kurama asked

Mandy stopped crying and said, "I'm not crying."

Ash looked up and saw the new arrivals. "Who are they and why are they and why are they here?"

"This is my great ancestor, his girlfriend, a perverted monk, a demon exterminator, and a thingy," said Mandy as she pointed to each person in turn "I dunno why they're here."

"Hey, I'm not a thingy! I'm a kitsune!" said Shippo as he crossed his arms angrily.

"Really? So am I! Sort of…" said Kurama

Shippo climbed up Kurama's arm and stared at him in he face before saying, "You don't look like a kitsune, lady."

Mandy, in anger, punched Shippo, sending him flying into the opposite wall. "He's not a lady!"

Miroku looked disgusted. "You mean I groped a guy?"

Kurama's eyes widened "You WHAT!"

"May I banish him before he causes any more trouble?" asked Ash

"Yes, please," answered Mandy.

"Almost, Insane Chocolate Lovers, it's almost done!" announced Raven from the kitchen.

Everyone rushed into the kitchen shouting "FOOD!" Then, the people who would not have normally done that asked, "Why did I just run into the kitchen and shout 'food'?"

"Oh well," Ash shrugged. "Idiotic creature, prepare to spend eternity in a cage in the Sahara Desert with Kuwabaka!"

"No, not Kuwabaka!" Miroku shouted. "Anything but that!"

"Do you even know what a 'Kuwabaka' is?" asked Inuyasha.

"No, but from the way she said it, it couldn't be good," replied Miroku.

Suddenly a black hole appeared to sweep the perverted monk into its grasp and teleport him to the Sahara Desert where he caught his first glimpse of the idiotic male with which he was to spend eternity, or until he could free himself from the accursed cage. Miroku shouted, "Oh no! It's worse than I thought!"

"Hey, what's that supposed to mean!" asked the idiot.

Miroku started beating against the cage with his staff shouting for help.

AEC1990: Idiotic computer of disaster! Cut it out!

BlacVlvtn: Hello, and welcome back to Author Discussion Period, the place where we ramble pointlessly.

AEC1990: Characters are allowed! You won't see Ash and Mandy here though… ever. We're Ash and Mandy! Kind of…

BlacVlvtn: AND SCHOOL'S OUT! And I just finished off a candy-bar-ish brownie.

AEC1990: The laptop in Blac's living room is mean…

BlacVlvtn: Yeah, the mouse was screwed up… and quizilla (don't own) was messing with my patience… DAMN 404 ERRORS! attacks 404s and pop-ups with a bazooka

AEC1990: I choose to ignore… Oh! And Harley Quinn uses those things!

BlacVlvtn: finishing off last pop-up What, this bazooka? pop-up splits in two… those two continuing to divide Pop-up mitosis! Kill them! AHHHHHHHHH! practically blows up room with bazooka

AEC1990: BlacVlvtn, destroying pop-ups one window at a time.

BlacVlvtn: You got that right…

AEC1990: Oh, and in the mention of Harley Quinn above, we're not talking about the type of book, we're talking about the Joker's girlfriend. And if you don't know who the Joker is, go watch Batman.(also don't own… heck, we don't own anything)

BlacVlvtn: The psychopath has a girlfriend? shrugs I guess there's somebody for everybody. Except Kuwabaka.

Kuwabara: Hey, what did I do?

BlacVlvtn: You were born. Get back in your cage!

Kuwabara: I hate the cage! Don't make me go back to the cage!

Kage: Did somebody call?

BlacVlvtn: Hey Brandon! glomps Kage

Kage: Get offa me! And my name's not Brandon!

BlacVlvtn: It's what your mommy calls you!

Kage: You don't know my mom.

BlacVlvtn: Sure I do!

Kage: Since when?

BlacVlvtn: Since now.

Kage: What's my mom's name then?

BlacVlvtn: Uhhh… Mrs. Brandon's Mom?

AEC1990: I have nothing to say. I like listening to them fight.

Kage: about to rip Blac's head off

BlacVlvtn: gets bazooka This baby's never failed me!

AEC1990: Be careful Blac, you don't want to spend the rest of your life in prison or be put to death. I'm not entirely sure about the laws about murder.

BlacVlvtn: Actually, more men get the death sentence than women. In the state of Texas anyway.

AEC1990: Okay.

BlacVlvtn: It's statiscally proven.

Kage: 43 of all statistics are worthless.

BlacVlvtn: That's because 50 are made up on the spot… like that one.

Kage: If you don't have anything smart to say, zip it!

BlacVlvtn: Let's go watch The Young & The Restless (don't own).

Kage: No, I don't wanna watch it! I hate soap operas!

BlacVlvtn: Oooh, the TV's on! starts drooling while sitting around TV with all characters and AEC

Kage: sitting behind them on couch with remote I hate this channel… switches to some sort of alien invasion

AEC1990: I could care less!

Lily: attempts to punch Kage but gets blocked every time Damn you!

BlacVlvtn: Gimme the remote!

Kage: Why should I?

BlacVlvtn: Because if you don't I'll dock your salary for a month!

Some character: to readers Kage is Blac's bodyguard.

Rei-Hiei in background: Change it back or I'll slice you open with my katana!

Kage: Salary, channel changer, or life… gives Blac the remote

BlacVlvtn: Good Kage. pats him like a dog and gives him a Kage-treat

Seto: You've got somebody to treat like a dog too! Although I have no idea why he's dating my daughter or why I'm permitting it… Hey Lily, why are you dating the dog?

BlacVlvtn: Because I made her and I told you to permit it! Well actually, you're almost totally oblivious in _Lily of the Black Rose_.

Lily: What do you mean 'almost'? Almost except for the part where I said I loved Joey?

Joey: When did that happen?

Lily: Um… in the hospital some time after you left. Oh by the way, you left your green jacket there.

Joey: Yeah, I know. Ever wonder why I wasn't wearing it during Battle City?

BlacVlvtn: to readers _Lily of the Black Rose_ is set between the two tournaments. changes channel back to soap

Everybody stares at TV (even AEC!) except Kage, who is looking like he's ready to kill.

AEC1990: Hold on the DVD player's in here! Why don't we watch the Yu Yu Hakusho movie? Anything to get the soap opera off the TV.

BlacVlvtn: Yay! I'll get it! runs off

Kurama: Why's she so excited?

AEC: You're in it. And in scene 6 you bathe in a lake. Blac told me the scene number.

Kurama: --;; Ah, that explains it.

AEC1990: She also likes the various swear words.

BlacVlvtn: returns with DVD Got it! Let's put it in and watch some good ol' animated blood and gore!

AEC1990: I never got to see the outcome of the movie. Can we do that today?

BlacVlvtn: Well considering it's about 2:30 in the morning, according to my cheap 5 dollar watch, I think we can fit it in.

AEC1990: Computer says it's 2:28. Or it did, 2 minutes ago.

Misti: Where did you get a 5 dollar watch?

BlacVlvtn: You got a line! And I got it at WalMart.

Blac's Dad: The Blip Zone!

BlacVlvtn: What are you doing here? I thought you were asleep. (to readers: It's 2:30 AM at Blac's house)

Blac's Dad: I was, but all the random shouting woke me up.

AEC1990: What random shouting? I wouldn't permit random shouting at this hour.

BlacVlvtn: Well, I do have a bazooka.

Blac's Mom: Why do you have a bazooka! (to readers: Blac's mom's a lawyer… tee hee)

AEC1990: I-It was t-to kill the pop-ups! That and threaten Kage.

Blac's Mom: Who's Kage?

Kage: I am, Mrs. Blac's Mom.

Blac's Dad: I thought your name was Brandon.

Kage: vein popping Does it matter?

BlacVlvtn: tries to hide bazooka behind back What bazooka? You just go back to sleep!

Random characters push them back into their room.

Some parent or another: Stop the insanity and go home, all of you!

AEC1990: What about me? I was told I could spend the night!

Other parent: _You_ can stay, the others can't.

END CHAPTER 2 AND PART 1

AEC1990: Hold on a sec, I've got something to say before we go!

BlacVlvtn: All right, but hurry up! I wanna finish off this part!

AEC1990: Thanks to some magic spell Sailor New Moon did recently, Yami has his own body. **_You'll need to know this before you read the next chapter!_**


End file.
